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21 September 2009 @ 04:52 pm
 
I am the very model of a modern major Heroes fan
I DVR the premiere even though I know the show's a pan
I plan to watch each episode and every Monday night at work
From 8 p.m. to 9 I'm so distracted that I'm quite a jerk

I'm very well acquainted, too, with characters so shippable
Petrellicest and Mylar and Mattmo are all so flippable
Who's topping and who's bottoming is what goes through my dirty mind...
I'm lucky that the actors in my show are all the purty kind!

(She's lucky that the actors in her show are all the purty kind,
She's lucky that the actors in her show are all the purty kind,
She's lucky that the actors in her show are all the purty, purty kind!)

I'm very good at writing fics, both het and slash and gen and femme
I know the cliches I should well avoid when I am writing them
In short, I do what all my fellow fangirl social zeroes can--
I am the very model of a modern major Heroes fan.

I know the mythic history of the Company and all that rot
I know that Peter's natural, I know his brother Nathan's not
I know the holes that permeate most of the continuity
And where the cliches multiply into near-perpetuity

I can tell just when Mohinder's accent gets all gentrified
And made up explanations as to how Ted never ends up fried
I can name the episodes when Muggles was a different dog
And recite all the words from each infernal op'ning monologue!

(And recite all the words from each infernal op'ning monologue!
And recite all the words from each infernal op'ning monologue!
And recite all the words from each infernal op'ning Momo-monologue!)

I'll talk about the different outfits that we have seen Sylar don
And tell you ev'ry color in the rainbows scarf that Mo puts on
In short, I do what all my fellow fangirl social zeroes can--
I am the very model of a modern major Heroes fan.

(In short, she does what all her fellow fangirl social zeroes can--
She is the very model of a modern major Heroes fan.)

In fact, when I know what is meant by "Eclaire" and "Adonica"
When I can play the Shankar theme near-flawless on harmonica
When I read Beeman's Blog and I keep up on Wendy's Twitter feed
And when I know precisely who's on set by what make-up they need...

When I have learned to stay far from the drama (I know, finally!)
When I make macro sets that make you ell-oh-ell and oh-emm-gee
When I write porn and people's nether regions feel quite blown away
You'll say a better major fangirl never set up an LJ

(You'll say a better major fangirl never set up an LJ
You'll say a better major fangirl never set up an LJ
You'll say a better major fangirl never set up an LJ, LJ!)

With all my dedication, though, I stay stuck on the job at night
And when everyone's watching, to keep sane, a parody I write.
But still, I do MOST of what all my fellow social zeroes can--
I am the very model of a modern major Heroes fan.

(But still, she does MOST of what all her fellow social zeroes can--
She is the very model of a modern major Heroes fan.)
 
 
The Soul is:: sillysilly
 
 
 
Shona: primeval - connor (hee!)toestastegood on September 21st, 2009 09:53 pm (UTC)
LOL!
Tiptoe39tiptoe39 on September 21st, 2009 10:02 pm (UTC)
Heee!

I don't think you've ever used "Adonica," but it rhymed so well with "harmonica..."
Shonatoestastegood on September 21st, 2009 10:03 pm (UTC)
I usually stay away from name smushes, but I find myself very taken with Adonica now. It sounds so epic and mythological!
Tiptoe39tiptoe39 on September 21st, 2009 10:04 pm (UTC)
*looks around shadily* Why, yes... that was JUST the effect I was going for, absolutely! ::shifty eyes::
saavikam77: Heroes Eclipsesaavikam77 on September 21st, 2009 09:55 pm (UTC)
Oh gods, that's hilarious!! XD *dies*
Tiptoe39tiptoe39 on September 21st, 2009 10:02 pm (UTC)
*gives you claire's blood* thank you! :D I was going for that reaction... minus the dying part.
Moorishmoorishflower on September 21st, 2009 09:57 pm (UTC)
I don't know whether I should be impressed or sad. XD Iloveyousunshine. <3
Tiptoe39tiptoe39 on September 21st, 2009 10:02 pm (UTC)
I think I am a very poor person to counsel you on that question. Love you too. :-P
Maxwell Arcturus: pigeonscitiesfalling on September 21st, 2009 10:01 pm (UTC)
I'm afraid that it's worse than I thought. It seems that the F-Cells are multiplying. The diagnosis is grim. I'm afraid that by the end of the night you'll be...-dramatic pause-...a total fantard! -gasps all around-

ilu bby. You cheer my friends page right the hell up.
Tiptoe39tiptoe39 on September 21st, 2009 10:03 pm (UTC)
Well, good. ILU too. Bahahaha.
The "Zed" Word: LOLLERSKATEZstefichan on September 21st, 2009 10:14 pm (UTC)
I love Pirates of Penzance. And this. And vicariously, you.

This made me OMGLOL.

You win the whole day <3
Tiptoe39tiptoe39 on September 21st, 2009 10:15 pm (UTC)
\o/

So glad. :D
10% literal, 90% metaphor: *LOL*speccygeekgrrl on September 21st, 2009 10:57 pm (UTC)
Oh Tippy, you GEM. xD
Tiptoe39tiptoe39 on September 21st, 2009 11:00 pm (UTC)
Can I be a rhinestone? I love rhinestones! *sailor moon voice*
aquasnake08aquasnake08 on September 22nd, 2009 03:24 am (UTC)
OUT-STAND-ING. 8D